Saturday, July 9, 2011

why did the chicken cross the road??

Question ... Why did the chicken cross the road?


PLATO: For the greater good.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross roads.
KARL MARX: It was a historical inevitability.
CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
HIPPOCRATES: Because of an excess of phlegm in its pancreas.
MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.: I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.
MOSES: And God came down from the Heavens, and He said unto the chicken, ``Thou shalt cross the road.'' And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.
FOX MULDER: You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross the road before you believe it?
RICHARD M. NIXON: The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat, the chicken did NOT cross the road.
MACHIAVELLI: The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who cares why? The end of crossing the road justifies whatever motive there was.
JERRY SEINFELD: Why does anyone cross a road? I mean, why doesn't anyone ever think to ask, What the heck was this chicken doing walking around all over the place, anyway?
FREUD: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.
BILL GATES: Our soon-to-be-released Chicken '98 will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook.
OLIVER STONE: The question is not, ``Why did the chicken cross the road?'' Rather, it is, ``Who was crossing the road at the sametime, whom we overlooked in our haste to observe the chicken crossing?''
DARWIN: Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are now genetically disposed to cross roads.
EINSTEIN: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.
BUDDHA: Asking this question denies your own chicken nature.
RALPH WALDO EMERSON: The chicken did not cross the road... it transcended it.
MICHAEL SCHUMACHER: It was an instinctive maneuver, the chicken obviously didn't see the road until he had already started to cross.
COLONEL SANDERS: I missed one?
PHYSICIST: Because the chicken's momentum had a positive component towards the other side of the road.
QUANTUM PHYSICIST: Because you measured its momentum too precisely.
MATHEMATICIAN: Because of the intermediate values theorem.
ALGEBRAIC GEOMETRIST: Well, consider a faithfully flat etale coherent sheaf...
C PROGRAMMER: cross_road() was called from get_other_side()
C++ PROGRAMMER: chicken->CrossRoad() was called from chicken->GetOtherSide()
OMAR KHAYYÁM:
MARKETING DIVISION OF MICROSOFT CORPORATION: Where does your chicken want to go today?
MARVIN: The other side is just as dull as this one. Don't talk to me about chickens.
ARTHUR DENT: Why did the chicken cross the road? 42? No, that doesn't make sense.

HAMLET:


To cross, or not to cross, that is the question: -
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind, to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous side;
Or to take arms against a road of troubles,
And by crossing end them?

Sunday, July 3, 2011

july newsletter

just a quick blog to let you know the july news letter is out for Better Scrapbooking. read it here!

and the
Craft Out West
16th and 17th July
Te Pai Centre
Craft Show Entrance
(Indoor Netball Facility)
Adults: $5.00
Senior Citizens: $3.00
Children under 12yrs: Free
Proceeds to Hopice West Auckland

is happening soon.  looking forward to it.